Post-China Thoughts From Dad

Upon returning from our adoption adventure to China, I began compiling a short list of thoughts regarding our trip and new, additional eater. Here is the culmination of those musings.

1. I left Grant a 2 year old and returned to a 14 year old. Seriously. The kid weighs twice what he did in July. I think he spent the month carb loading. Not to mention the fact that he seems so much older to me. He asks me how my day at work was when I get home, and I'm pretty sure I caught him trying to buy cigarettes. It's ridiculous.

2. Erin and I should not take three week "vacations" together. We have a solid marriage, and in general we enjoy each other's company. But if there had been some sort of "hit your spouse with a hammer" booth in the Hong Kong airport, it might have gotten some use from one or both of us. A three week trip of any kind is hard in general, but the adoption trip is even more stressful. You're couped up with each other a lot of the time in hotel rooms, and suddenly, you begin noticing things that perhaps you would normally overlook. I was reminded of Erin's temptation to leave dirty diapers strewn all over our hotel room, and she was reminded of my inability (or complete non-inclination) to change a diaper at all.

3. Maybe we should go on vacation now. Since our trip to China was very "unvacation" like, I'm already trying to figure out where we can go this fall. After a month in China, very "uber American" things sound good. I'm not sure Erin could dupe me into Branson again, but if ever there was a time... Maybe we'll do a small getaway to Cincinnati or Chicago or something during her fall break. We'll see...

4. Having two is harder than one. Since we didn't have any food when we got home Friday night, we all got up at 4am and went to breakfast on Saturday morning. We went to our local coffee shop, The Elegance, and immediately things went haywire. Forks were being thrown. Two year olds were squirming uncontrollably. The Chinese kid was pushing over water glasses and making demands. It was chaos. I told Erin, "We need to start taking people up on those 'date nights,' otherwise we're never eating out again." Then somebody crawled under the table and dumped egg on my pants.

5. Four kids? Really? We've always said we wanted at least four kids, but I am hereby publicly declaring that that decision might need to go under review. I realize that we've only been home a few days, and we're already starting to develop a routine. But I'm not going to lie and say that those first couple of days didn't scare the crap out of me, at least a little bit. I told Erin at one point that we had officially reached the limit of our parenting. Toys were everywhere, I couldn't sit down to watch TV without someone screaming about something. Every time I went into the kitchen I stepped on a different human being. It was crazy. Luckily things are starting to even out already, so perhaps four is still an option.

5. Girls are different than boys. This became fairly clear to me late in high school (those health class videos were funny...and scary), and it's being reinforced again right now. Grace wears little bows in her hair and cries when you throw a football at her face. Grant laughs when he passes gas and tells me "Good one!" when I burp. Grace's shoes have little ladybugs (or maybe they're strawberries) on them. Number three will be a boy. I will not lose the power struggle.

I'll try to post more thoughts in the coming days. Grace still has the habit of smiling at me and then smacking me up side the head, so hopefully I'll be able to maintain conciousness long enough to remember them all. Erin scolds her when she hits me (I would, but I'm usually crying), but I'm also relatively certain that I saw them high fiving each other as well. The balance of power is already shifting...