Welcome to Paris!

...Paris Las Vegas, that is.

I have arrived in Vegas for the International Consumer Electronics Show.  While there are perks to getting to spend some time in the desert in a nice hotel (it IS supposed to get to 60 degrees here today), there are definitely some down sides.

Since we're staying in Paris this year, the first thing I'm having to get used to is the use of what I'll term "hack French" on every sign.  "Le Buffet," "Le Garage," "Le Machine That Eats Quarters."  It's a little over the top. 

I understand wanting to provide ambiance, but couldn't they have just piped in some body odor and had a "Hurl Insults at Americans" booth in the lobby?  (I keed, I keed.  I worked for some delightful French people for many years.  Until they sold me to China.)

This morning I got up and got dressed for a workout.  Since my back has been such a mess, I have worked out faithfully.  And since I'm going to be on my feet for the next week, I wanted to be sure to not let that lapse.

I headed down to the 2nd floor where the workout center was located ("Le Spa.")  Upon arrival, I was informed that I would have to buy a daily spa pass at $25/day in order to use the elliptical machine for 35 minutes.  Uh, no thanks.

I did what any good midwesterner would do and told "Le Attendant" that I thought that was sort of a crock.  It didn't seem to phase her since there was a line of willing suckers already behind me at 6am.

And this is the problem, as I see it, with Las Vegas today.  Our cabbie on the ride to the hotel lamented the days when the mob ran things here.  At least then you could get a cheap room and a cheap meal, and in between you could dump loads of untraceable cash into the casino. 

Today, you just get robbed at every turn.  It'll cost me $20 for a bowl of oatmeal and a coffee this morning, which leaves a taste in my mouth which is, well, "Le Crappy."