Independence

A while ago, I read a book that really challenged me when it came to my parenting: Free Range Kids.  I can't say that I agreed with all of the book, but it did make me consider some pretty ingrained tenants I had about raising kids.  The basic concept is this: kids used to be allowed to do a great deal for themselves (imagine riding bikes with the neighborhood kids to the pool or walking home by yourself from school for lunch), but we have, because of the incorrect perception that they are not safe, started holding our kids hands through much of life. And, I walked away from the book promising myself that Grant and Grace (and now Trent) would have the opportunity to become wonderfully independent.  I've always told myself that every day they are with me is one day closer to the day that they won't be with me... and I need to prepare them and prepare them well.

So, I do things I'm not sure other parents do (I say this because I often get some pretty bad looks).  I let my kids take the stairs while I take the elevator.  I let them play in my un-fenced backyard without me outside. I send Grant into the post office to buy stamps, into the pharmacy to pick up pictures, into school to pick up forms, and I make my kids order their own food when dining out (if you don't order it, you don't eat it: that's my motto).  Essentially, I lose sight of my kids--on purpose--a lot.

And all of that preparation makes today quite significant for both of them.

First off, it's Grant's first day of kindergarten.  From this day forward, he will never be without an obligation in life.  He will begin to understand what work is (as life isn't all play, after all).  He'll begin to transition from home being the sole place of his universe.  And, this morning, he was more than ready: all smiles... never looking back... able to handle anything that came his way.

And, Grace, for whom today marks the third year of her arrival in our arms, is also quite independent.  I'm not sure I would have guessed that our timid toddler would become so insanely capable of navigating life all on her own.  She, too, runs errands, at just over four years old!  She, too, talks to anybody, uses manners with fierce commitment to them, and told me today that I don't even need to walk in the preschool building in a few weeks when she starts (how did the "you can drop me at the corner" start so early).

It all makes this mommy a little teary.  They are growing up so fast, and they need me less and less.  But, that's good: because this mama ain't raising her kids to live in the basement playing video games when they are 26!